Apparently, it’s all over come Saturday.  I haven’t written anything here too personal in a while, but since apparently I only have 48 or so hours left, I thought I’d end it on a high note.

If there is no future, then I have to become something that’s not really in my nature, and become one of those people whose life only exists in the rear view mirror.  What do I think of when I think about my life?  A lot of random things really as I see my life flash before my eyes…

Since I never married, I take a lot of pride in usually upholding all the major ManLaws.  There’s enough females out here for all of us.  Never speak ill of your homie’s girl cause one way or another, it always gets back to her.  Never sell out another man’s private affairs under any circumstances.  If it takes a lifetime, pay back all vendettas. Your mistress and your wife shouldn’t live in the same town, let alone the same house.  (Not that I know anything about that last one, that’s just what I’ve heard. Let’s move on.)

I’ve had my heart broken and I’ve broken hearts.  If you have a soul, neither experience is very pleasant.  But it’s life.  The first woman I ever proposed to was Lauryn Hill (true story).  The look she gave me on that particular night could have cut glass, but evidently she didn’t remember it because when I had an actual conversation with her a couple years later, she couldn’t have been nicer.  She was the first ‘star’ I met, so it framed my expectations of celebrity.  In my experiences, generally celebrities are pretty down to earth, it’s the ‘Entourages’ that are complete intolerable.

It’s an understatement to say I was an ‘anomaly’ as a black Muslim kid in Kansas who wasn’t desperate to get married at 21 years old (or now either, but that’s neither here nor there). I very much had a ‘Bachelor’s’ Bucket List: New Years Eve in Vegas, the Bayou Classic in New Orleans (pre-Katrina), South Beach Spring Break, Nationals for my Fraternity, Hollywood movie premiere party, D.C. and the GoGo scene, ATL and Buckhead and Club 112 and the Blue Flame. And I did it all, before I hit 30 if memory serves me correctly.  At this point, my reputation as ‘Hollywood’ is much bigger than the reality, but I accept how hard reputations are to shake.  Certain stories (my first earthquake and the night I threatened to beat up my best friend immediately come to mind) will never be forgotten.  But you know, if you can’t stand the heat…

I’ve headlined short films and reality shows, I’ve seen my jokes and suggestions appear in Hollywood movies and TV shows (they weren’t stolen, I gave them away), I’ve gone back to my hometown to watch films I’ve directed shown on the big screen.  And I thought I was done writing, but I did have one more story in me, one I wrote for my Ummah.  Doesn’t look like there’s enough time to see it through, but I was/am very proud of it.  It’s slowly being seen by those who need to see it, but if there is a Sunday, maybe I’ll talk about it then.  Or knowing me maybe I won’t.

Live for today, plan for tomorrow.  It’s worked out pretty well for me. Now let’s see what comes next…